Duuude.

I've been really out of my own blogging loop for a while. I've been sort of keeping up with some reading, mostly keeping in touch through Instagram, but what I've gathered is that Capsule Wardrobes are "in" and they're filled with neutrals and stripes.

Well, I guess I've been accidentally capsule wardrobing for a really long time, then.

I'm taking the capsule-chic one step closer to lazy and have been doing two things with what I've been wearing lately. 1. Replace a lot of dead and dying clothes (China water is really mineral-y and makes clothes crunchy and gross much more quickly. Goodbye, old worn out favorites) with pieces that are a little oversized, since my intention is to be pregnant on repeat and knock out the whole "let's have lots of kids" thing bing bang boom style. And slouchy/ comfortable works in pregnancy, post-partum, and toddler chasing. 2. I'm buying the bulk of my new favorites in the men's section. Been doin' that since my belly got big, like here, here, here.

Spring Neutrals

Spring is just my favorite. I love the sidewalks start getting hot during the days, the rains that feel a little bit warmer, bright green new growth, watching perennials pop out of the ground almost overnight. My favorite thing about moving to a new place is discovering new plants and the way they grow and change in springtime. Seeing what blooms.

So why, for the love of Pete, do I always wind up wearing nothin' but neutrals?

Oh, yeah, that's right- I keep trying to pass off all the non-colors I wear as "classic." And I like it.

Like Mother Like Daughter

I am my mom's clone.

I really can't get enough of wearing shirts from the dudes' section while my midsection is expanding. It's so comfortable and, let's face it, long enough and less hoochy than most stuff in the women's section. I feel like I can get the same popular "casual, slouchy chic" look by buying boys' clothes rather than a boutique oversized sweater for triple the price.

So, how's my momma fit into all this? She's my neutral-loving inspiration and boy clothes pioneer. She spent much our our childhood wearing khaki, white, grey, and navy. She's the queen of the Hard Rock Cafe tee. And I can't count the number of times she bought men's pants and sweaters. While I'll probably stick with ladies' jeans, I am happily walking in her footsteps with the whole neutrals thing. Ivory, white, grey, and black. It's my go-to lately. Plus a pair of lady-like animal print shoes. But, she'd never go for that, so at least I'm a little bit of my own person.

Flip

Ladies, I need advice. Kiddo is still hanging out breech (actually, it's a little more transverse) at the beginning of 32 weeks. And I know I have no real need to be nervous yet, but what worked for you all to flip and spin your little ones in utero and how did you make sure it stuck? Kindly remember that I live in China, so special products and special spa treatments are both non-options and my ability to communicate safety concerns with masseuses and acupuncturists is limited. Please and thank you.

Second, I love/laugh that this adorable swing jacket that I usually wore belted (like here, or here) is now beautifully fit for my rapidly widening pregnancy hips. And this ridiculous new pair of maternity pants so perfectly walks the line between casual and work-wear appropriate. I love them mucho. I can't wait to wear them with not-sweaters and jackets as the sun keeps popping out to say hello.

Strategy

Winter gave me a major case of the "blahs" this year. I know it doesn't hold a candle to the miserable winter so many of my Midwest buddies had to tough out (sorry you're so snowed in and pissed about it, mom) but everyone here has said last summer was the hottest on record in decades, and this winter was one of the coldest with the highest humidity in the last few years. We got no more than a pathetic sprinkling of snow, but commuting in the soak-into-your-bones cold has been darn unpleasant. Add into that the fact that my favorite coats all now fit like sausage casings and it had been too cold and clammy to leave them unbuttoned. Boo hoo and shut up, Kate. I'll keep reminding myself that my masterful 3-undershirt layering skills kept me mostly warm enough every day without turning me into a puffy coat and Cosby sweater Chinese fashionista. Outer layers, like this cardigan, never did piddly for keeping the chill at bay- it's just for show. What you can't see is that I consistently wore a skintight camisole tucked into my pants so there was never any cold gusts, a GapBody stretchy long sleeved tee, and an outdoor-grade undershirt or two under the sweater of my choice. Every dang day. 

Plus those unattractive LLBean boots. 

I better keep an eye on those poor boots- I'm afraid Rob will send them away before next winter. I just hope he has enough sense to realize that they're my pull-on-dog-walking-shoes, too, and if they disappear, so does my obligation to get up to take the beagle out at 6:30. 

Sausage casing coat. Good look, Kate, good look.

Beginning of the End

Well, I've done it. My 30 days' notice has been submitted, I'm working like mad to help out with as much infrastructure as I can, but I'm going to stop working. And it's mixed emotions.

First of all, I don't want to make anyone feel bad- The only real reason we are able to pull off the stay at home thing financially is because Rob's very normal first year professor's salary stretches a whole lot further in China. Second, my income is quite generous by cultural standards, but still just a fraction of what could be considered a "second income" so we're not losing out on a lot. Third, the cost of having a kid over here is out of pocket doable; not cheap, but not unmanageable- my access to benefits was only linked to my working up until birth and coming back quickly afterward. The healthcare package and coverage was clear within the structures of very standard Chinese public hospital care, which isn't going to be a legitimate option for us since only the "VIP" services, which aren't covered, offer English language assistance reliably. And homegirl isn't brave enough to chance midnight labor at a hospital with no English speakers to call. 

So, what do I gain by saying Goodbye to my tenure as an administrator? Big big big deal gain is that I'll have an available and open schedule. Time to actually attend Expat mom groups to start making friends and gaining intel on how having a kid over here works, getting someone's used German diaper bag for a major discount, and spending time with ladies and kids who will become our community for the next few years. I've already met a few people just from skipping one day of work to go to a mom group before my doctors appointment and got clued into a few seminars that I'll be going to to learn more about this whole mommyhood thing. I'll also have weekday free time to go to Shanghai to shop, rather than spend precious weekends fighting the crowds. There's one Shanghai H&M with a maternity section and I don't fit into any of my pants anymore, so it's an urgent and necessary trip. Same goes for some Ikea shopping, and Rob can't stand the Sunday crowds. Also, for the first time ever in their lives, my critters can get used to a schedule where they don't get crated for a whole workday. And the poor recovering beagle can get some beautiful springtime day muscle building walks before the heat of summer and inconvenience of a human sibling ruins his chances for some TLC. 

But, I do work with some lovely people and have really enjoyed flexing my meticulous organization and protocol creating muscles to help the new School of Music get off the ground. It's a wise step to help me get into the headspace of this next phase for our family since I'm lousy at work/life balance and establishing boundaries, but I step away with a bit of sadness and a little "oh my gosh, how am I really going to fill my time?!" fear. Stay at home mommas- how did you feel when you made the choice to stop working and how on earth did you cope with the post-honeymoon "Freeeeedom!" jolt of reality that comes with stay at home routines?

In the meantime, I'll pump up my work wardrobe a notch to make up for the truly lazy wintertime dressing I'd been passing off as office-appropriate attire. C'mon springtime.

Cultural Shifts

Third Trimester. Boom. And it's a bump that's finally a bump, not just a burrito, which makes me really happy. Every few weeks, I get really hungry and kiddo grows like a weed, and next thing you know there's more happening out front. And I'm really grateful so far that family genetics have been good to me and I still feel fine.

I've noticed a cultural difference in attitudes about pregnancy over here. We passed a woman last night who must have been right around the same due date as me. And, while I'm still pretty nimble and limber, thankfully, goooooosh, she was waddling. I've not seen a woman who was visibly pregnant walking like she didn't have a softball balanced between her thighs. It's crazy. I don't know if the Chinese physique really does get very uncomfortable much sooner, but I'm inclined to believe that women are expected to appear faint and helpless and not lift a finger during pregnancy. The wider the waddle, the more effective the baking of a kid? And most of them don't seem to be loving it even a little. Babies must be for grandparents. Because mamas look pretty blah about the whole thing. Weird.

The Grind

Daaangit. I'm back to work.

It's a big week to be fresh back at it and rolling at full steam- we have over 100 prospective students arriving for two days to audition for the music program and take diagnostic tests for musical knowledge. The Chinese higher educational system is really different from Europe or the States; students typically have to apply for the University, complete an audition (pretty normal), but the tricky part is the "quota system" where there's a minimum score on the entrance audition and a percentage allotted to each province based on how many applications we receive. On top of that percentage divided into 40, the maximum we can accept, a student's attendance depends on a passing grade on the National Test and our school being on the top of their list of acceptable schools. Lots of stuff has to line up to get kids in the doors!

So, wish me and my only legit pair of maternity pants (hauled all the way over from the States with fingers crossed that they would fit!) good luck, and keep your fingers crossed that we wind up with some great students for next year. Mostly my office mates need the good vibes, I just need to keep up a good attitude. Don't want to go back! I really liked managing my house and family for a month.

 

 

Mild Weather and Walks

Suzhou is in the midst of a nice mild break in the weather, so my days at home with the animals have been quite pleasant and layers worn haven't been quite as thick. We're due to dip back down, though, so don't get too harumph-y about my bragging.

I don't think I ever mentioned it, but poor Miles escaped my parents' house while he was staying with them, tore greyhound-speed circles around on wet, muddy grass, and tore a ligament in his back right knee, followed, of course, by surgery. In October. And he's still kind of gimpy (no shock, it's a long healing time). So, a lot of the reason I'm so very glad to have this extensive time home (especially with nice weather) is so I can take him on multiple slow walks each day, in hopes that the muscle mass lost in resting and healing can be slowly rebuilt and get his little ligament stretched out so it doesn't hurt as much. I'm not totally sure it's working yet, there's lots of evenings where he's hobbling around on only three legs, but we're trying. And since it's the week of celebration for Chinese New Year, almost everyone who is from elsewhere in the country has departed and gone to spend time with family, so it's much more devoid of crazy Chinese neighbors who panic everytime they round the corner on the weaving walking paths to see me and my big bad beagle sniffing the ground and minding his own business. Seriously, one 14 year old girl screamed, "DOG!" and ran away from us. Miles was literally 3 feet off the sidewalk, sniffing a discarded skewer from someone's cart food snack.

But, on the flip side, a 5 year old boy was playing some sort of chase or hide and seek game with his dad one evening and was really enamored with this weird looking critter (most "China Dogs" as my sister called them look like this or this. Perfectly cute, but nothing I'd want to love on). Miles could tell this kid was into him and sat down like a gentleman and I told the kid he could come over. He touched the silky ears, patted his head, and squatted down to look Miles in the eye. He then popped up, yelled he wanted to tell his dad, and came running back to show off his new buddy.

Melt me right into a puddle.

Too Small

So, two stories for you all.

One: I wore this outfit to my 24 week doctor's appointment last Saturday morning where I was scheduled to have an ultrasound and glucose blood test. Well, I had the glucose test (all is good- no indication of problems!) and went down to my ultrasound for the heart only first. The first words out of the tech's mouth were "Tai xiao le" or "too small." Well, poop on a stick. They claim that the size of this kiddo is closer to 21 or 22 weeks (which could really only be possible if I had a 7 or 8 week cycle and got a positive pregnancy test approximately 6 hours after ovulation. TMI? Whoops), so I'm figuring that maybe we're off by a week and I'm growing a kid just the same as everyone does on my mom's side of the family- little kid, little bump, little momma. So, I'm rescheduled for my OB and ultrasounds for next week instead (which turns out to be totally fine- Rob will be back in town and gets to come with me for the first time!)

Two: About 8 short weeks into my pregnancy, I 10000% broke the zipper on these grey jeans. I squatted to stretch them out a little (they always fit a little snug) and the zipper slipped down past the bottom teeth and that's all she wrote. Well, now that I'm not buttoning or zipping anyway... welcome back to the rotation, I guess.

 

Neutral Overload

Ladies and Gents, I'm in the midst of Winter Holiday. Thaaaaank goodness.

Moving on. It's time to adios these pants. They were once really great thrifted, lined wool, perfect light grey trousers. But they're getting a few more moth holes and the lower rise means they don't do the job of covering all of what ought to be covered anymore. And I only have a finite number of long-hem blouses to cover that mess up with. So, thanks, grey trousers, for coming overseas and helping me out through a solid handful of early 2nd trimester cold winter workdays. But you won't fit from here on out this winter, and any amount of weight that sticks around for next season will help you to remain unwearable. So long.

That said, this outfit was a stinker. Not a total bust in real life, but it photographed way more mono-tone than it was. The sweater is a little darker oatmeal in person, but, it was still pretty one note. Well, now I know. The look was saved only by this half up-do that actually made my hair look good. A tiny bit beehive, but mostly just out of my face chic. I'll take what I can get.

Have you worn a dud outfit lately? Am I the only one with no shame who actually posted it for the good ladies of style-blog-land to see? (Actually, I know for a fact that a handful of the women I follow have posted and mentioned "meh" looks lately or did a "worst of 2013" post, and that's why we're internet friends. Honesty is the best policy.)

Stretch Dresses

Being a beanpole and pregnant all at the same time is proving to have it's own set of interesting dressing conundrums. I'm finding out pretty quickly that while pants (toootally unbuttoned and worn with a belly band) are my most layerable and warm option for the cold and clammy Suzhou winter, there's something tragically uncomfortable about the situation. I'm finally getting a little bit of a belly, but that must be nothing but other organs migrating north. Because this kid is still hanging out way low. Which means I'm trying to cram not only pregnancy weight, but the entire body mass of a 20 week kid below a waistband. All you mommies and pregnant gals out there- how did you carry? Any tips for my sitch? I'm going to go try looking for a maternity fashion store out in the city over the weekend, but I'm not feeling very good about my chances of locating anything even close to flattering.

Let me paint you a word picture of one young mama to be that I saw in the fall who was probably around the 35 week mark. It was daytime highs of 65, no real need for bundling, and this lovely gal was wearing the following: a dull ivory turtleneck under a Cosby sweater, which was in turn under the most humpty-dumpty in jodhpurs pair of overall-jumpsuit hybrid khakis I've ever seen. And the scary thing? Darting and seams that made it tragically clear that the offending leiderhosen were meant to be maternity wear.

I will not succumb, I promise.

So, moral of the story is that I will be seeking many opportunities to buy el cheapo stretchy dresses from H&M in a few sizes too large to maintain some semblance of ladyhood as I get more and more basket-ball-y. I'll cross my fingers for Rob to find a pair or two of maternity pants when he goes back to Houston in a week to bring back for me, but I'm going to have to find a way to keep making my regular pants and repurposed dresses work. Because if my fears are confirmed, I will not be doing any Chinese maternity brand shopping.

Nearing the End of Semester 1

Well, folks, I think all of the Western World's holiday breaks have already come and gone. And China has only had a 3-day celebration of the new calendar year (which I worked Saturday and Sunday prior to it to "make up the days")... so I am really looking forward to rubbing in my sloth when the Soochow University semester ends next week. 18 week semesters (!) deserve a nice long break, so I'm especially grateful that the whole country builds in a nice long hiatus to celebrate Chinese New Year. 

Rob is heading to the States solo next week and I'll be hanging with my critters and kiddo bump (who is still smallish) here in China. I'm a little sad not to have the opportunity to travel to use some of this extended break time, but I'm not going to say a peep because it's several weeks of quiet, training and adjusting with critters, and the chance to do some shopping without having to work around any sort of schedule. I like that.

Long and Slow

I've been in the midst of a funny couple of weeks. 

First: the news. I am going to be working at the School of Music office! Since the School is brand-spankin' new and kind of groundbreaking in its intention to teach music curriculum in English here in China, there's a lot of materials that are going to be put out bilingually. And some of the ladies already on staff have international experience and a pretty great English foundation, but it needs a little polish... so I get to put my thumbprint on reworking and crafting exciting new English language documents and press as we're getting off the ground. 

But, in true China fashion, getting the details worked out, contract drafted, and registration completed is taking forever. So, I'm still not working and didn't get to help prepare for the opening premier concert this upcoming Sunday. Which is a bummer, since this is our first POW! introduction to the Suzhou/Shanghai music community. And it sure would have been nice to place a critical eye on the materials, but oh well. Next project. When I'm officially on the team!

Also. We tried to prepare the paperwork for getting our shipment of boxes through customs and because Suzhou is in Jiangsu province and Shanghai (and the port through which our stuff arrived) is kind of its own thing, we needed stamps and approval from both customs' offices. Meaning backandforthandbackandforth travel to Shanghai- a day-long waste of a day trip each time. Foooorget it. Rob's colleague swooped in and saved the day by calling her shipping agent from earlier in the summer, who will be managing the rest of the paperwork and having our items delivered for us. And she's crazy capable, so I'm very grateful.

Moral of the story. It all takes literally four times longer than you think it should and is at least 7 steps more complicated. All of it.

Sigh. Of relief!

Jeans: Gap...Tank: Banana Republic...Cardigan: thrifted...Shoes: Target

Plain Jane

Being on the far side of the Pacific has, style-wise, been a little funny for me. First, I chucked some of my long time favorite articles of clothing because I literally wore them until they shouldn't be worn any more. Loved them to pieces and put them into a garbage can in the days before we left Houston. So, I'm down about 30%. Second, I kept a lot of my simple, classic, wholesome American gal clothes. Simple skinny jeans, a few buttondowns, lightweight t-shirts. Things that aren't risky or fashion-forward, but are just solid workhorse items. A glorified capsule wardrobe, if you will.

And I didn't keep summer clothing, you guys. Bad choice.

It's a great mix of perfectly slouchy sweaters and layer-able stuff with slim-fit pants. So, come fall and winter, I'll be golden, but for now, I'm sweating my buns off and rotating between this skirt and shorts (which I hate on my skinny legs- ugh, chicken knees) and a few tanks and tees.

And this desperate deficit of options, lack of first-month-in-town positive bank balance, and having a simple wardrobe means I'm stickin' out like a sore thumb. China's a little funny with fashion. Sometimes ladies look so mis-match chic, young and fresh in their boutique fashion (there's literally thousands of small clothing stores along the coolest shopping avenues here), I look like a bowl of vanilla ice cream. But sometimes these adorable young women wear the dowdiest or hodgepodged or hello-kittied looks. Perhaps another day I'll take my camera out and about with me.

Skirt: H&M...Blouse: Target...Belt: Target...Shoes: Nine West...Bag: Longchamp knockoff

Conundrum

What does one wear for meeting the Dean of the School of Music for the first time? Especially when the group dinner is being held at an undisclosed location? Rob and I (and all of the other new faculty we've been spending time with) all freaked out and didn't have an answer.

Neutrals. Definitely neutrals. And not too fussy.

So, this super lightweight sweater for the warm evening should do the trick. Loose, it won't touch my torso too much and make me sweat, but it's pretty covered-up.

Pants or skirt? Skirt. No, pants. The sweater looked a little weird tucked in. 

Heels or flats? Well, heels would look nicer... Crap, all my nice pumps are in our shipment. These flats will be fine.

Maaaaan, I got brutal with purging my wardrobe before this move. My dress and shoe situation is a little pathetic. And my "getting ready and looking decent" routine is a joke.

Jeans: Gap...Sweater: thrifted...Shoes: Aldo, via Buffalo Exchange...Belt: Target...Scarf: Liberty of London, thrifted...Bag: Longchamp knockoff

Adios to the Three Musketeers

Skirt, Cardigan, Belt, Necklace: Target...Shoes: Nine West via Buffalo Exchange

Well, it's happened. We had our first for-real adios. Our friend (Rob, his Bromance, and this buddy all three came into the doctoral program together) is getting ready to skip town for several summer festivals and conferences and he definitely won't be back before we leave. There have been a few friends that have left after the school year ended who we won't see again before we move, but this is the first major goodbye.

And I didn't cry. Don't know how I managed it, but I didn't cry. It may be because his wife is still in town and I know we'll spend time together, so it doesn't feel "real" yet.

Anyway, we did a BBQ, because there really isn't a better way to say farewell than with a potluck and burgers. We started a grease fire, let it burn off and roasted marshmallows a few hours later, sipped a hodgepodge of leftover beers from the graduation BBQ, nibbled on chips until the 90% humidity made them stale and disgusting, and did a lot of really good reminiscing.

Gosh, it's been a good four years here in Houston.

Ding!Ding!Ding! We Have a Winner!

Skirt: Target...Sweater: Gap...Scarf: gift from Rob's interview in Suzhou...Belt: swiped from a skirt...Shoes: Naturalizer...Bag: Longchamp knockoff

Rob and I frequently play a little game in the mornings. Neither of us are really shower singers, but there's a lot of music, tv shows, quotable movies, and made up tunes rattling around this household. So, morning is usually the post-sleep subconscious time for randomly recalling a little ditty and get it lodged in your head. 

"I'll give you a hundred dollars if you can guess what song I have stuck in my head right now"

We usually give a clue of real song vs. movie or tv tune, but that's it. No extra questions. Just three shots to pull from literally thousands of inside jokes. Sometimes it's Aerosmith, sometimes Phantom of the Opera, sometimes it's the Slap Bet song from How I Met Your Mother.

Rob ACTUALLY guessed that "Under the Sea" was in my head. It's been the first time either of us has accurately guessed the right answer. I actually owe him $25 dollars! I might pay out in nickels, just to spite him and his superior guessing skills.

Thank goodness I didn't bet a pony or McFlurries every day for a year.

My timer caught the moment I flung the door open to open-mouth, wide-eyed stare in wonder at his guessing prowess. I pretty sure I looked like this.